I Assaulted David Archuleta

Jul 13, 2009 by Jared Smith

I flew into Los Angeles today and accidentally assaulted David Archuleta in the process.

I was seated in the front, bulkhead row of cabin class and when the plane stopped at LAX, I stood up, squeezed through traffic, pulled down my bag from the overhead compartment, and then tried to back into the galley area right by the exit door. I didn’t realize that while I was getting my bag, David had come from First Class and had occupied the area immediately where I was backing. I smacked him pretty hard with my backpack. Of course this is perfectly understandable because in real life David is roughly the height and build of Frodo Baggins.

I immediately apologized and he said it was OK. It took me a few moments to realize who it was. I knew it was someone famous, but it took a second for my mind to process…

Famous person? Yes.

Singer? Yes.

On TV? Yes.

A Jonas Brother? No.

David… whatchamasomething……….? Yes!

I now realize that if I’d have been paying attention, I would have realized something was up before we landed. Apparently everyone on the plane but me knew he was in first class. I suddenly realized that the stench of estrogen was strong in the air and that every female was now mobbing to get a glimpse of him. I was literally being pushed toward him and he was being pushed, by me, into a corner. I’d like to say that I was filling the role of his bodyguard by shielding him from the onslaught with my body, but I really didn’t have control over the situation. (He was, by the way, totally alone.) We were inches apart and face to face… well, face to neck/chest/breast area maybe.


Here’s how our conversation went from there…

Me: “Oh… Hey… How ya doin’?”
David (smiling): “Great!”
Me (shouting): “GET BACK YOU DEVIL WOMEN!!!” Ok, I didn’t yell this, but wanted to. Instead I stupidly asked, “You here for work?”
David (probably thinking I’m a git for asking that question in L.A.): “Yeah.”
Me: “Cool. Ummm… have fun!”
David: “I will.”

The flight attendant then opened the plane door.

Me and David at the same time: “Go ahead.”
Me: “No, go ahead.”
David: “Go ahead!”
Me: (Stared at him knowing there’s no way I can go before HIM!)
David: “Sorry. OK. Thanks.”

We then exited the plane where we were both mobbed by teenage girls who kept asking us for pictures… or more specifically, asking me to take a picture of them with David. I think they thought we were together – probably brothers… or something like that.

He was very gracious and even thanked me a couple times for taking pictures of other people with him. I did sneak one quick picture in before he literally RAN through the terminal to get away from the growing mob of giddy teenage girls and middle aged mothers.

David Archuleta

  1. 63 Responses to “I Assaulted David Archuleta”

  2. Omg you are so lucky!!!!

    By ArchAngel11 on Jul 14, 2009

  3. u are hilarious. i love how you told the story. and u are waaaaaaaaayyyyy lucky to have been that close to him (and smell his breath. lol) and to have been able to converse with him. :)

    By kat on Jul 14, 2009

  4. Okay if i hear anyone else tell you how funny you are or how lucky you are to have stood in David’s presence I’m going to puke! get a life Mormon housewives and teenage girls. doesn’t the new twilight come out soon? move on to the next wave of frenzied waste of estrogen. let’s get back to something only our family and friends will think is funny. eh.

    By jill on Jul 15, 2009

  5. Take a breath jill and calm down.

    I personally love David and really enjoyed your story! thanks for sharing!

    By Rach on Jul 15, 2009

  6. Jared, what a wonderful experience. Once you meet David, you can’t forget him. Your story was great. Now you know, what we his fans know, that he is “Just David”. A truly genuine, real super guy with an amazing voice and personality to match. Thanks!

    By judie on Jul 22, 2009

  7. Ha! ha! David munching on peanuts! He does like nuts though! I think a picture of David running at the airport from the mob of gals would be a sight to see!

    By MaddieLynn on Aug 9, 2009

  8. David Archuleta is definitely one of the best singer in American Idol.-‘*

    By Christopher Mills on May 18, 2010

  9. David Archuleta has a great voice but i do think that it is not the best voice’;”

    By Abbie Hunt on Aug 30, 2010

  10. i just thought that adam lambert has a much better voice than David Archuleta.”.

    By Gabrielle Ross on Oct 11, 2010

  11. @Gabrielle Ross Who asks? Write it in your own journal! David Archuleta has souful voice comepletely different with Adam lembrant bla bla voice!!!!

    Sorry Anyway Jarede thank you so much for sharing this priceless story!!! ILOVE ITTT!!!

    By Monica on Jan 4, 2011

  12. Oops I left same comment to two persons by mistake…anyway What I’m trying to say is shut up idiots!!! David ARchuleta is the BEST!!! HAHAHAAHAHAHA!!!!

    By Monica on Jan 4, 2011

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  2. Jul 15, 2009: Story from Jared Smith | davidarchuletaindonesia.com
  3. Jul 22, 2009: David Archuleta FanBlast » “I Assaulted David Archuleta” - THE David Archuleta Fansite

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